grrr

so the lg15 banner didn't work.. i guess i'll have to go the old fashioned way...

yayyy success! =]

=] =] =] =]

okay so i know i havn't written in a while, but nobody reads this so does it really matter?
anyways
i am super excited because tomorrow at 8 am the LONELYGIRL15 SERIES FINALE starts. i'm super sad and super excited because 1, it's going to be over, and 2, it's the end of something really great. but i'm excited because 1, i finally get some answers, and 2, i'm hoping bree will come back into the picture even though she's supposed to be dead.
i'm hoping this code works.... eeeek!!!
[IMG]http://i48.photobucket.com/albums/f209/gymcutiepie01/lg15.jpg[/IMG]
if it doesn't i'll post another with a different code.
okay so my road test is on wednesday august 6th, so i'm super excited about that i'm not really that nervous because i feel that i'm a good driver but the only thing i'm a bit worried about is parking. most of the time i can't do it well so hopefully i can do it good for my test.

okay well ta ta for now, i can't wait till tomorrow morning!!! i'm totally taking a sleeping pill tonight at 10.

reflection..of sorts?

so as i sit here, reflecting on my day as a whole, i believe it was somewhat a good day. i read a whole book, i cried (sometimes it's good to cry...) i laid around in my pj's for most of the day, and i figured out that i should never go driving or practice parking with my mother. she stresses me out so much and all i can ever hear is "nag nag nag nag nag" it's seriously the worst feeling in the world to be driving with my mother. she totally just comments on every little thing you do wrong. like i forgot where i had to turn to get into kresa and she totally flipped out so i asked her what to do and she says "well i don't know. figure it out!" and it's just like well what the fuck do you want me to do?! it's like every little thing i do wrong is the end of the world as we know it. it's like i forget one single little thing and it's like the sky will come crashing down if i don't fix it right away. i was sitting at a red light and it turned green so i was going to go and then i was just checking to make sure nobody was coming because some people can me jackasses on the road so my mother decides to yell at me while i'm driving to go because it's green! it's like "um hello i can pay attention... stop being a backseat driver god damn it!" but of course it didn't stop there. of course she had to freakin critique every single thing i did wrong when i was trying to park it's like "um dad doesnt do this, he actually tells me when i'm doing good instead of ragging on me when i make a stupid mistake" and i was vacuming my room today and i got my blanket stuck in it for a second and she's like what the hell did you get caught in the vacume now? and i'm just like jesus can you calm the fuck down for one second?! and then whenever my friends are over it's like she's silently judging them like it's some big deal that they aren't exactly "popular" even though at northern there aren't really "popular" kids. it's like wow yeah my friends are a little bit eccentric. that's what i love. they march to the beat of a different drummer. holy shit they're a bad influence. i think i can tell when somebody's a bad influence. exibit A: liz and becca, 7th and 8th grade. yes i know i was stupid and i learned. exibit B: taylor, liz, becca, and basically everyone who was pressuring me to do drugs with them this year. yeah i know how to handle these kinds of things. and i swear to god if becca tries to pull the "renae's the worse kid here"stunt then out comes all of her shit that i know about. seriously i can't believe that they have even thought that she's the better kid or at least that she thinks that she's going to be able to pull this off the rest of her life because if she so much as crosses me about shit like this it's all over. her shit's on the table.
god i can't believe how good it feels just to say that. i'm not the bad kid. i'm not a bad kid at all. i do my shit, yeah i'm a bit lazy, yeah i'm fat, yeah i eat, yeah i have friends that are just as wierd as i am. but at least i don't sneak around behind my parent's backs. at least i've never even taken a sip of alcohol or a hit of any drug. EVER. at least i'm still a virgin. and at least i actually try to study.

wow
okay
i'll write more later
xoxo
renae

long time no post

hello!
so it's been a few days since i've posted anything
so i've decided to tell you about my past few days.
it's been so busy with friends and my grandma and everything that i havn't even checked my myspace.
so the last thing that i can remember about this week was that i went to the movies with my friend lauren. finally.
we went with adam and we saw mamma mia... he didn't seem to like it very much... =[
but he payed for my consessions so it's all good =]
after mamma mia lauren spent the night and she slept in my bed and i slept on the floor.. not too bad...
then she left at like 11 and i did chores and becca took me to schoolcraft because my mom thought i could get a job at the mcdonalds there... ugh so i went and picked up an application and came back home and did chores and then that night we had a fire and stuff and i ended up not going to bed until 4 so then i woke up around 8 to ask jessica if we were taking our walk.. we never did... bummer right? so then becca eventually took me to schoolcraft so i could drop off my application.. i have an interview at 3pm on monday... idk how i'm going to get there but i guess we'll figure it out... and then becca took me to meghans. so around 4 i got to meghans and we just decided to hang out nothing much and then we decided it'd be cool to go play lazer tag with the guys so we ate dinner and left and OH MY GOD cam restivo is so freakin hot now. we all played mini golf and then we played 4 games of lazer tag and we got so freakin sweaty it was gross so while playing lazer tag i kept on getting cam and he was like "are you kiddding?!" like maybe he was impressed or w/e but he was laughing about it and then he hit my middle fingernail with his lazer gun and that hurt so bad and he was so sweet he made sure i was okay before he went off and shot people and after the game he made sure i was okay. aww so sweet =]
but i've noticed i kind of suck at lazer tag.. they were all saying how they wanted to do like a weekly think, thursdays at 7 and then dan said "you're not coming are you?" and i just shruged my shoulders so i don't know if i'm invited or anything so whatever. i guess next time they're going over to his house and going swimming afterwards so i don't want to do that so whatever.. i'll get my own team together.
so after lazer tag we went back to meghan's and we talked for a bit and got changed and eventually we decided it would be cool to sleep on her trampoline so we did... we only made it till 5 because it was freezing so we went inside and slept in her room on the floor. and then i had no way to get home today so i had to call my sisters and becca couldn't because she barely had any gas left and she'd have to bring the kids and since hunter's car seat is really hard to put back in the car she couldn't take mine so i called jacqui who works today and she was kind of pissy with me because she had to be to work by 1. so eventually she came and got me and i came home and took a shower... what a relief... and now i'm on here writing =]
anyways
i just wanted to tell SOMEONE
so i'll probably write later

xoxo
Renae

a survey?! =]

place an X by all the things you've done and remove theX from the ones you have not. Answer the questions at the end andand post on your blog for all your friends (including me) to see. This is for your entire life!
( ) Gone on a blind date
() Skipped school
() Watched someone die
(x) Been to Canada
() Been to Mexico
(x) Been to Florida
() Been to Europe
(X) Been on a plane
(X) Been lost, in any sense of the word,
(X ) Been on the opposite side of the country
() Gone to Washington , DC
(X ) Swam in the ocean
() Cried yourself to sleep
(X) Played cops and robbers
(x) Recently colored with crayons
() Sang Karaoke
() Paid for a meal with coins only?
(X) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't?
(X) Made prank phone calls
(X) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
(X) Caught a snowflake on your tongue
(X) Danced in the rain
(X) Written a letter to Santa Claus
() Been kissed under the mistletoe
() Watched the sunrise with someone you care about
(X) Blown bubbles
(X) Gone ice-skating
(x) Been skinny dipping outdoors
(X) Gone to the movies
1. Any nicknames? Rae, RayNay(add a horsie if you would like...), Nae Nae, boo boo
2. Mother's name? Karla
3. Body Piercing's? EARS
4. How much do you love your job (on a scale of 1-10)i don't have a job, so 0
5. Favorite vacation spot? hawaii
6. Ever eaten cookies for dinner? YES
7. Ever been on TV? no
8. Ever steal any traffic signs? no
9. Ever been in a car accident? no
10. Drive a 2-door or 4-door vehicle? four
11. Favorite salad dressing? ranch or thousand island
12. Favorite pie? lemon crunch
13. Favorite number? 13
14. Favorite movie? harry potter, the da vinci code, dead poets society, a few good men, 10 things i hate about you.
15. Favorite holiday? christmas
16. Favorite dessert? cheese cake
17. Favorite food? chinese, preferably orange chicken
18. Favorite day of the week? monday... wierd right?
19. Favorite brand of body wash ? Olay
20. Favorite toothpaste? Crest
21. Favorite smell? vanilla and lavendar.
22. What do you do to relax? read, watch tv, lay in bed and think, write.
23. What is your number 1 pet peeve in the whole world? people who do drugs and high schoolers drinking
24. How do you see yourself in 10 years? 10 years i'll be 26, so i have no idea, hopefully i have a career and i'm out of school maybe a teacher.
25. Furthest place you will send this message? i'm not sending it, but i guess it can go anywhere in the world now it's on the internet.
26. Who will respond to this the fastest?nobody...

psyched!

So this morning, as i woke up from only max 4 hours of sleep, i headed downstairs to find my list of chores to do today. i think i broke a record for myself because i did everything : swiffervac, dishwasher, sink,couch covers, room, cups, wastebaskets, and a few things i decided to pick up in under an hour. usually it takes me all day but my mother said i had to do everything before lauren comes over today. which i have no clue when that will be because she hasn't woken up until 2 for the past week and i kind of want to do something soon. so i called jessica to see if she wanted to go to the park with me and she said "in a few hours" right... then lauren's going to be over and jessica's going to go all "drama drama blah blah you don't like me blah blah blah i'm sad now feel bad for me blah blah blah" when seriously it's not my fault i mean, yeah i could have not even called her but if she could do something right now then what's the problem? okay yeah the world doesn't revolve around me, which is something i need to work on remembering because to tell you the truth, i'm really self centered, and stubborn, and at times rude, and i think i also have a touch of OCD when everything needs to be exactly at the right time and everything needs to fit together and if they don't or if someone messes that up then i get really upset which is wierd because usually i'm really disorganized but i get on these crazy rants where i organize my whole closet and dresser (see 2 nights ago... ) and organize everything else in my room (see last night...) but it seems that that never translates over into my locker which always looks like if it didnt have a lock on it, would burst. it also never translates into my folders for school or my bags. i mean, i definately like the idea of everything being organized and i do organize it but i can never keep it that way. oh and 2 days ago i also alphabetized our dvd collection and took all the dvd's from my room that i didn't buy and included them in the whole dvd collection. i don't know what it is about me, but i'm just becoming more and more like my mother every day. it's not like my mother is a horrible person or anything, i mean most of the time she's really cool but it's like when she gets in this mood she's just crabby and bitchy and rude and if someone gets in her way when she's trying to clean it's the end of the world. and i get like that somedays. i know i've talked about what i want with my life before, possibly only in my about me, but it's like people think that living by yourself with animals is a horrible thing. i just don't understand why it's not okay for some people to choose not want to get married or even be with someone. i've never been comfortable with boys. i mean, yes taylor, and nathan and adam which i mean at least 2 out of 3 are definately going to be gay by the time we roll around to our 10 year high school reunion but i'm not so sure about adam. i mean, yes he is kind of femenine but i don't know if it's just because he has 3 sisters at home and hes just really good friends with girls. i know i know, it sounds like he's gay because he has alot of friends that are girls it's just like he was very much attracted to his ex girlfriend meagan in a totally sexual way like he would tell me about everything they did together sex-wise. i don't know if i don't think he's gay, or if i just don't want him to be gay. i have absolutely no problem with people who are gay. i love that they've chosen the way that they want to live and it just seems like they're free. i on the other hand, totally feel that if i end up living alone with pets, people will start thinking i'm the crazy cat lady and it's just i don't really see the point. anyways back to me maybe not wanting adam to be gay. i mean yes i think it's fine if he was but he's been a really great friend to me and i don't know, it's like whenever i become friends with a guy i start to like him like in a totally non-friend way. i dont know, i mean i didn't before because he was dating meagan and i didn't want to see the wrath of her if i made a move which i wouldn't because i'm not a boyfriend stealer. i dont know i mean he's cute. he's nice, he's wondeful, he's so supportive but at the same time he's really critical which i mean i can't deal with someone who just says great things all the time because that just makes me feel like a jackass whenever speak my mind. i don't know, he and meagan were "soul mates"... right... but i don't know where any of this is coming from. gahhhhhh.
okay anyways.
i saw dixon the other day. dixon was my economics and government teacher for sophmore year. she's really cool and she lives in my neighborhood. me and jessica usually go and see her. sometimes if brianna's over we'll all go or just me and bri will go and visit. the first time me and jess went to go see her it was so incredibly awkward. i didn't talk because i thought it was wierd to visit teachers outside of school but eventually we started seeing her about once a week or even twice a week sometimes and it was really cool. this last time i went with jess and we ended up going through dixon's pictures from prom and graduation and then her freshmen year of college and it was really cool. i was funny to see how wild she was and how wild her friends were and it just all makes sence how she wouldn't care when kids talk about drinking and stuff in front of her because it's obvious in her pictures that she did when she was in high school. she never lectures us but at the same time she gives us advice on little things. i think she's one of the coolest teachers i've ever had.
aww mushy moment...
haha
okay done
well i'm glad i vented on here today. i wonder if anybody reads this..
anways
xoxo
renae

GOOD MORNING =]

i just have to say, i really love this blogging thing. i think it really works for me =]
okay on to the first deal of business
1. for IB english next year we have to read one book from the summer reading list which includes Life of pi, which i thought was absolutely boring when i read the first page... Moby Dick which i didn't want to read because i don't like classics, and the Kite Runner which i absolutely loved! along with reading the book we had to write notes about it which was the main characters with brief explanations, settings of the novel, conflicts of the novel, and last but not least, a possible theme of the novel. i figured i'd just do the notes like a week before school started but i didn't want to leave it for later because i think i'd forget about it and i was feeling really productive tonight so i decided to do them. i did... and i finished. and it really wasn't that hard once i went to wikipedia and just basically rephrased everything on there =] so that's done
2. i really want to get my license sometime before school starts because um hello... it's called "i'm sixteen and i havn't gotten my license and almost 2 months have passed and i really need a car so i don't have to ride the bus!" and so i got really annoyed with my mother and how i just want to take the test and i don't need to practice parking anymore because i can do forward and backing really well and if i don't pass parallel that's just 4 points off and you need to get 6 points off to not be able to leave the parking lot. so she said she'd take me on tuesday up to KRESA to park and hopefully she won't be really naggy and hopefully i won't get so annoyed that i just want to give up like the previous two times i have went parking. i really hate parking
but i love driving
so i guess it's okay.
3. my mom bought the whole twilight series including the book that's supposed to be coming out soon. and i've been really wanting to read them because people said they were so good and i saw really neat flairs on facebook about twilight and how aparently edward cullen is so sexy even though you have to imagine him. so i'm deeply excited that soon i will be in possession of the most popular books of the summer =]
4. i have been really interested in the Da Vinci Code both the book and the movie for some time now so i decided to go on to yahoo answers and type in "books similar to the Da Vinci Code and i got a whole list of religion-puzzle-solving-adventure type books and i also added a couple from amazon that sounded good =]
5. i just found out about this AMAZING new gadget called the amazon kindle. it's this electronic library that doesn't use wifi, it uses the kind of connection that powers cell phones which is really cool. it's $350.00 but once i get a job i really want to start saving for it! all the books for it are $10.00. you can email word documents to it, you also get free wireless internet connection directly to wikipedia =] my fave =] it just sounds so cool that i HAVE to have it =]
perhaps my parents will chip in a little bit =] i mean, it is for education =]
haha
anyways
this is the end of my blog for this morning.. wow it's morning... wierd...
bed time, i slept horribly last night on the couch so i plan to sleep wonderfully in my bed.. after i organize my closet and dresser of course =]
i'm telling you, i feel so productive today!

xoxo,
Renae

talked to my mom...

so i talked to my mom last night about how my sister shouldn't be able to bring the kids over when i'm supposed to be doing my chores and it ended up in my sister getting all pissy about how i don't even have a hard job to do so why should it matter so i brought up the point that she should be watching the kids instead of throwing them in front of a tv or the wii and she was like well i watch them.. and im like no you don't! you're on the computer the whole time! and she's like well i watch them and it's not like their distracting and im like... well it is when i swiffervac then hunter goes in and eats and gets stuff all over the floor then i have to do it over again. and my mom was like "you should be cleaning up after them... it's not just at their house that you need to clean up after them!" so i have no idea if she's going to keep bringing them over or what, but if she does i'm just going to be like i'm doing my chores take them to the park.

it feels so incredibly cool to be able to tell somebody this stuff instead of telling one of my friends who doesn't really care. alot of people get annoyed by me because i always complain about this kind of stuff so now i have someone to tell who won't get annoyed =]
on the other hand,
i got my glasses thursday
and i absolutely LOVE them!
i'm only supposed to wear them for reading and school work but i like them so much that i just wear them all the time! =]
okay well my friend lauren called me yesterday and she said something about going to go see mamma mia with our friend adam, now i don't remember when we were supposed to and i can't get ahold of her to ask. nobody's answering at her house which means she's probably still asleep and her cell's off which doesn't really suprise me. i really wanna go though because i have money!
finally... i have money.. =]
okay well news on jobs.. nobody has called me yet! this sucks because i really need a job because if i don't get a job then i can't drive to school next year and if i don't get a job i can't take my driver's test which really feels like i won't take it ever. which sucks because i just want to go and drive and get out of the house every once in a while!

anyways, enough ranting

xoxo
Renae

sisters...

so this morning, my wake up call was my little cousin hunter, who's seven. he was thrown on top of me by my sister jacqui. my other sister becca was supposed to be babysitting him.... why she brings her work home with her i have no clue. it's like, i don't go over to my aunt and uncle's house and bug her while she's trying to work i mean i do chores around the house, no it's not exactly a real job but i still get paid and if i don't finish what i'm supposed to do, i don't get paid and it's kind of hard to swiffervac the floor and keep the floor crumb-free when you have the messiest 7 year old and a 10 year old running around and becca basically pushing them on me when i don't get paid to watch them. she on the other hand gets to get on the computer while hunter plays our wii and hannah asks me a thousand questions. i'm sorry but who's supposed to be watching them? she's supposed to be at their house, watching them, taking them outside, doing things with them, and she pushes them off on me or the tv. so i've decided to ask my mother to talk to my aunt and make becca not come over while she's working because it's not like the kids are doing anything productive and it's not like they're going outside when that's exactly what my aunt wants them to be doing all day. i'm sorry if hunter wants to play the wii, but maybe you should take them in THEIR backyard and have them play in THEIR pool.
i'm so sick of it!
anyways, i'm supposed to be swiffervac-ing. i ended up doing all the other chores earlier because i didn't want to have to deal with becca, jacqui, or hunter so all i have to do is swiffervac before my best friend brianna comes over. i have no clue what time though, she's supposed to call.
okay well enough complaining about my sister, i just came on here to vent

xoxo
Renae

my tattoo

so i've decided to get a tattoo


and i've loved harry potter for the greater part of my life so i decided why not show how much i love the books than by getting a tattoo that reminds me of it?


now i'm not going to go crazy and get harry potter's face on my ass.
it's a little bit small but you can probably get the point on what i was thinking... i love the quote "it does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live" it's from dumbledore in the 7th book when harry was having a "dream" where dumbledore was and was trying to help harry decide whether to die or live.
i think it's a great quote because it's like i don't want to miss out on amazing things because i'm waiting around for something to happen. you have to make your own destiny.
my mom said she liked the quote and she'd pay for half of how ever much the tattoo ends up being which.... it might be alot.
I NEED A JOBBBB!!!!!!
anyways, i'll write more later, tomorrow, or some other day

xoxo,
Renae

The first blog =]

so this is my very first blog. i'm super excited. although, i probably won't keep up with this but i'll look on the brighter side of things and say "yes i will keep up with this". school starts in about a month and i'm super stressed because i confirmed my schedule with my counselor before school ended and i couldn't get into my European History class so i have to take Creative Writing now and i hate creative writing. i also have my EFA class on the first day and i don't know if i'm supposed to go to the first day or if i'm supposed to go to school or if we're doing the whole club fair/ school pictures/ class assembly/ schedules on the first day. it's just way too stressful. on the other hand i'm about to go make lemon bars because my mother won't and i might possibly put together my bed =]

xoxo
Renae