the sims 3?!?!?!? omg so awesome... =]

working at burger king sucks

omgsh so this video at the bottom took fucking forever to put on here so people better be fucking reading my blog....

if anyone ever wants to work at Carol's corp Burger King on S. Westnege in Portage Michigan, i highly advise you not to. don't even apply. it sucks

seriously i hate it

i want to quit so bad

but if i stay until next year, 

i could get a scholarship!

so i was supposed to work today at 4 until 9, just a normal saturday night. my boss called me and told me they had to cancel my hours because another manager screwed up labor and now they can't have me work. i'm sorry but who the fuck does that? how do you screw up labor so bad that you have to call people and let them know they can't go in. second, i went in to see if my hours were cancelled for tomorrow too and her step- daughter was working so i asked her. and you know what she said? she said that my boss didn't cancel my hours because of labor but because she heard i was going to be putting my 2 weeks notice in soon.

who the fuck does that?! that's basically saying "oh i'm firing you because you are about to quit" is it not? i'm sorry it's exactly the same. and by the way i wasn't looking for a new fucking job until you started cutting me from the fucking schedule and cutting all of my fucking hours and calling me and telling me not to come in. that just fucking pisses me off

you know what else pisses me off...

when you give your friend a ride to school every fucking day and you also give her a ride home from school every fucking day and you take her to speedway every fucking morning and at least once a week you take her to the exact fucking opposite side of town from where both of you live and she fucking chain smokes in your car and leaves it a fucking mess. that what i hate. 

it's like you can't take your fucking trash with you? you can't wait till you get out of my fucking car to chain smoke and give yourself fucking lung cancer? no you can't you have to roll down my fucking windows when it's fucking 10 degrees outside and chain smoke while i'm toting your ass around town. yes i understand that she gives me gas money when i need it but seriously? i get 10 bucks AND lung cancer? wow gee wiz thanks a ton! so i decided to tell her that she can't smoke in my car anymore. and she put a fucking guilt trip on me! like why not? and i'm like.. okay first of all i'm getting smoker's cough and i dont even smoke... second of all if my parents go into my car and they just fucking open the door and breathe in, they will notice that it smells like the inside of a cigarette in there. and third, i smell like smoke every fucking day and i'm sick of people thinking that i smoke. 

ohhhh another thing, if you make plans with me first, keep them! don't fucking say that you have to go over to theron's just because something's wrong with his brain or whatever (i understand this sounds bad) but you fucking go over there what, 3 times a week and the other 3 or 4 days you spend with jason.

i was there for you before jason

i was there alot when theron wasn't there

i was probably there BEFORE theron

and yet i'm the person who gets ditched on a weekly basis

i'm the one that you hang out with for 20 minutes and theron or jason calls and you imediately have to go over there and i'm the one that has to waste their fucking gas (which you paid for but it's besides the point)

and i'm the one who never gets to see you

only you matter

only jason matters

only theron matters

and when something goes wrong, i have to help you pick up the pieces

and when i get the least bit mad at you and start telling you that what you're doing to me is wrong and i'm mad, you get hugely defensive and hurt and depressed like i'll leave you or i'll be pissed and i won't ever speak to you again because i do in fact mean alot to you it's just not enough for you to actually spend time with me other than the 20 minutes a day in the car where i'm suffocating because you blow smoke in my face.

if anyone reads this, i'm going to start vlogging soon i think =]

my youtube name is shanaenae0101

btw these pics are just some of my faves on my comp

from top to bottom:

Mitchell Davis/Livelavalive

Myself on halloween

a youtube livelavalive banner

art by Alex Pardee

another youtube livelavalive banner

more art by Alex Pardee

 

here's a video of me and jess 

dooood this took like 2 hours to get on here... =[

comment if you read this =]

heyyyyyy

okay so a new blog for a new day... well a new week i should say... ahha i havn't  been posting any blogs on here wellllll because i keep forgetting and i doubt anybody reads these.. haha 

well

if you do..

you should go get a life if you have nothing better to do than to read my stupid idiotic thoughts

haha

jussssttt kidding

so 

finally my wisdom teeth are feeling almosssst 100% better!

yayayay

haha

and winter break has been pretty fantastic aside from the pain.

i got to relax ALOT and have fun =]

i got a ton of new clothes

most of which i will wear during the first week of school 

=]

andd i'm trying out a new hairstyle =] yeahhhh 

haha

well

i helped my friend jessica through a tough spot she was having with her boyfriend

i felt really bad because he was being a complete and total ass and she was talking about how she wanted to go to the psych ward and i'm just like " uhhh hold up you don't need that you need to calm down and stop depending on him like he's the only thing in the world that matters because you have people here that actually love you and listen to you and he doesnt fucking listen to you

ughejfa;lkjefiajfe i swear if it wasn't for the fact that jess would probably get pissed at me i'd call him up and give him a piece of my mind. how in the world can a guy tell his gf to "stop being so emo" because she's telling him how she feels or  just say "blah blah blah blah blah blah" when she tries talking serious with him? i swear next time i don't fucking care if it pisses her off i never want to see her that upset over a guy because he does not need to make her feel that she can't live her life without him. she told me when she first dated him that she wouldn't let him controll her life. that she'd be fine if they broke up. then 3 months later they get "pre-engaged" whatever the fuck that is and 6 months later they're past the honeymoon stage and he's being a dick every week to her. it's like when is enough enough? i'm sick and tired of having to pull her up and remind her that she's her own person and she doesn't need him. even though she may want him, hes not the best for her and she doesn't listen. it's like when are you going to learn? do you like doing this to yourself. ugh anyways back to my winter break. i can't remember if i already said this but i got a MACBOOOOOKKKKKKK! ahhaha yeah its awesome i'm typing on it right now... crazy huh? haha recently i've been trying to get new music to go with my new look

and so far i've found a few really good bands

-The Maine

-The Ready Set

-Owl City

-Lady Gaga

and i've been on youtube alot just checking out some videos and i've subscribed to a few of my favorites

-livelavalive (omg michel davis is soooo cute and fricken hilarious!)

-residentmikelee (asian kid from michigan =] yeah i'm pretty sure he's from kzoo but idk he's only said he loves kzoo.... he goes to MI state so idk

-ShaneDawsonTV- this guy just puts me in a good mood every time i watch him he's such an inspiration because he lost 150 pounds and he looks amazing. he's still not comfortable with how he is, his brain's still thinking like he's still fat and he just seems like someone anyone could relate to, even though he is an actor/model hes basically amazing. 

-WhatIThinke- some kid from Canada, i really didn't know what to think at first but he just puts alot of news into perspective and he likes talking about news in canada and in the US and also international stuff so it keeps me up to date. he has this Douchebag Of The Day thing it's hilarious!

well tomorrow is the first day back from break and it's like midnight. 

my sleep pattern's been pretty screwed up since i got my wisdom teeth out. 

staying up all night + sleeping most of the day + getting up at 5:45 tomorrow morning = i will be one tired ass mofo

buttt i will look fabulous

okay

so this is going to be a more serious part 

i can't even fricken type this...

gahh

ok

i'm going to do it

this is something that i've been wondering about for a while now

i wonder if i'm gay

i mean, i do like guys

but it's like i come across a girl who's not girly at all and i start to really like her. 

you know, those types that listen to indie music, are all into art and photography and don't give a shit about what other people think

idk if i want to be like them or if i like them. i don't know

i just know that there's this girl that i'm kind of into right now

she's really cool

and i see her all the time

i've never spoken to her

but she seems like a really cool person

idk

gakljfeaijfeialjie

well

i guess my blog will be the first to know...

peace

-renae

happy holidays, happy new year!

so i haven't written on this in a while. i doubt anybody reads this. i got probably the best present ever for christmas! a brand new......... drumroll please

MACBOOK! yeah i was super excited when i opened it. it's super cute. matches my ipod. oh yeah i also got clothes, some cash, a gift card... i'm plannin on going shopping maybe wednesday with my bestie jessica! 

okay well anyways i hope anybody who reads this has a happy new year and had a great holiday!

xoxo

renae

EEEK!!

okay so i know i havn't written in a LONG ass time...
but i have good reason
last saturday i started working
at.... burger king.. i know it's a let down, especially since i thought i'd be able to take the job at celebration.. but of course not...
anddd
i worked saturday, sunday, monday, wednesday, and tonight.... and idk when i work next...
also, i started school on tuesday
wednesday was the first full day, and also the first day of classes.... i felt completely overwhelmed with my IB english 11 class that i decided to drop it and take English 11 instead.
also, since i'm taking the bus to my EFA class and back i've been getting back later and later it seems to my 3rd hour class. i had team sports third hour so i didn't think it was such a big deal but it was since i was coming back with less than half the class hour left to participate so i switched into a seminar instead. i really am so glad that i got out of IB english just because with working and everything i have absolutely no time to do homework, so with all the stupid projects and stuff i wouldn't be able to keep up. i'm super excited for Biology 2A with baker though! it's already really fun... idk why but i've always liked biology.... =]
my EFA is getting pretty fun too. we just got to go into the computer lab today which was really fun. they have awesome IMac computers and these really comfortable chairs =] haha and we get to get on facebook and myspace and stuff during class if we need to so that's always a plus =]
my Asian studies class seems pretty cool so far, i'm pretty excited.. kevin's in the class which i liked him last year 2nd semester... he lost alot of weight which i don't really care about... but i still think he's cute =]
haha anyways, i doubt anybody reads this so i doubt anybody missed me writing these stupid blogs...
oh if you do read this, i've somewhat come to terms with becca's abortion, i mean, i told jessica, erin, alissa, and brianna so it's not so much on my shoulders now.

anyways, if you were missing my blogs.. i'm sorry!
haha i doubt it, but if i end up forgetting to blog and you want to read these then email me!
morgan.renae@yahoo.com
or IM me at Mellamoyolanda23 on AIM =]

anyways, have a good weekend if you're reading this!

hmmmm...

alright, so whoever's reading this, i'm pretty sure that from my last post i was royally pissed off at my sister. well, that day after writing that blog, i decided it would be a good idea to calm myself down by doing some yoga booty ballet, which, didn't last very long, but i did have a GREAT idea while trying to do some excircise.. i decided to get my paints out and just go at it. i ended up taking all my anger towards my sister and putting it into my painting, i think it turned out okay, but now i know a way that i can cope with the feelings that get out of control, instead of yelling, or punching something, or even bawling my eyes out, i should go to my paints and just let it take me away. of course, last night i ended up using up all my paints so hopefully i get money from my mom before i have really out of control emotions =]
so i've decided to deal with what my sister did, it was the right decision for her, i mean, i would never have done that no matter what my parents said, but she's not mature enough to handle a baby. i know i wouldn't be either but i would grow up quick if i had to. ugh sorry getting a bit angry here... well i've decided to forgive her... she made an interesting point yesterday. she said "now no matter what you or jacqui do, it won't be anything compared to this." which i mean, i guess it'll get them off my back about grades and stuff, but do i really want that? i mean, if they don't push me as hard as they have, am i going to try as hard? i mean i have an EFA class, an IB class, and 4 other classes that i need to worry about! plus i might get a job (more on that later...) but seriously, i don't know if i could handle it without my parents pushing me to do better. i mean, yes i do hate it when they push me, but it all works out better because at least i didn't fail the class. okay so i said more on my job later, i applied at celebration cinema(if you don't know what that is then... it's a movie theatre) because my best guy friend adam told me that they would be hiring soon so if i needed a job i should go apply there. so i applied there and it's been a few days, but i asked adam how long it usually took them to call back, and he said usually they'll call on a sunday to schedule an interview for a weekday. so if they don't call by tomorrow i guess i'll call up there and ask if the managers saw my application. idk what i should say though... i guess just be like "hi my name is renae morgan, i dropped off an application last week and i was just checking to see if one of the managers have had the chance to look at it." ughgh idk i hate calling places. like delivery places... =[ i hate it. okay well my mom pays me for doing chores around the house every day, so i hope she pays me because last week i didn't get paid because i failed my first driver's test and then so i had to pay for it, but since i don't have a job she took it from my pay, which is only $20 and the test was $45 so idk if she's going to pay me or what, but i want to get paints but their so expensive.. i wonder if she'd pay for a couple colors, but once i get a job i can pay for my own, also i wanna get some canvases. idk what i paint.. i guess its more of feelings, like i did this painting a while back with oils and i gave it to my sister and basically i was trying to do a sunrise but i didnt' really come through with making a sunrise it turned into just colors all together, almost in a sunrise but it was alot of red and black and purple and blue and white but idk i almost thought it was anger, or frustration because i couldn't make a sunrise and that was what i was feeling, but at the same time it's not angry strokes, it's more of calm strokes so i was thinking that maybe it was like a "calm before the storm" but for feelings, like the calmness before the anger comes through almost like the anger washes over you. i know i'm not very good and i don't want to learn how, it's just something i do to pass the time. something i do to calm myself down, something i do to controll my feelings and to not show people what i'm feeling all the time. my face is so readable, if i'm the least bit mad people can see it, if i'm happy EVERYBODY can see it because i can't controll it. i like hiding myself from people, i guess this is why i'm writing in here, so i don't have to tell somebody this, at least somebody i know.

well i'm off to research paints to see where the cheapest ones are...

xoxo
Renae